Thursday, January 22, 2004

Weapons of mass destruction-related program activities

On David Kay's tombstone should be carved the phrase he apparently invented to describe what he found in Iraq after spending $600 million in a pointless attempt to find Saddam's non-existent weapons of mass destruction. This phrase exemplifies bureaucratese, and represents the tremendous failure that is David Kay's life. What is the phrase? "Weapons of mass destruction-related program activities" (see p. 2 of his 'interim' progress report; now that Kay has slithered off into the night, presumably it is no longer interim). That's what he is so proud to have found! There is so much fudge in that phrase you could open a chocolate factory with it. Related. Program. Activities. See how it rolls off the tongue - well, not really - but means absolutely nothing. Bush's speech writers liked it so much, they had him say it in his most recent State of the Union Address (but they wisely left out references to African uranium this time).

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